INFINITE HOPE

Aaaah, finally the end of a long, neverending,  draining day--cannot wait to to get home--almost there. 


Oh no.  My phone is ringing again.

His voice sounds frail, fading...."Honey can you come over?  I don't feel well."

Ummm, no.  I can't....I really can't.....I have plans....I was going to....

flop on the couch

 

eat the lunch I never got to

 

go for a relaxing walk with my dog while the sun is still out

 

 

 

But I can hear it in his voice----

 

 

I'm scared

 

 

I don't want to be alone

 

 

What is happening to my body??

 

 

 

"Sure, I'll be there in twenty minutes"

 

 

 

His color is grayish-yellow.  I get that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.

 

Both of us know but neither of us says it---what the doctor has told him---that it doesn't look good.

 

 

"Well, your blood pressure is good and your lungs are clear."  We visit for quite a while and talk about everyday things--make light conversation.

 

 

I understand

 

I get it

 

Sometimes you just need another person there---another human being to make you feel normal, reassured, alive.

 

 

 

 

 

I can't cure him

 

I can't take away all of his fear and pain

 

I can't even promise him that he will see his granddaughter's next birthday

 

 

 

 

But I can be present--be with him---let him know that he is not alone

 

And I can give him

 

hope

 

Hope

 

HOPE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hope that everything will be allright.....just maybe not in the way he thought it would be

 

 

 

And yes,

 

I'm sure of it...

 

I know...

 

hope that everything will be

 

 

Way better than he could ever have imagined